Make your choice
by Scarlett.13.Rose
Summary: Logan didn't kill Jean Grey at the end of last stand, but now she's swimming in guilt. Yet, after a change of tides, Jean leaves Logan and meets someone new. Was it the right choice or did she put everyone in danger? And does Logan have some secrets that he is keeping from the rest of the team? Rated T for sexual activity (and assault) and light language. Jott and RoLo!
1. Chapter 1

The ticking of the clock on the nightstand keeps me awake.

No, it isn't the clock, it's my mind. The same mind that killed Professor Xavier. The same mind that killed all the employees at Worthington labs. The same mind that killed Scott haunts me every waking moment, and quite honestly, every sleeping moment as well.

I lay on my side, the steady moaning of the air conditioner in the corner of the room and Logan's arm draped around my waist should be enough to calm me. Yet the guilt is eating me alive.

Logan thought he was doing me a favor when he didn't kill me, but he didn't. He found a Psychic who brought me back to my senses and put Phoenix in her place; behind a psychic barrier in the absent part of my mind. Yet, I'd still be better off dead. Ororo practically disowned me, and Logan, when he refused to kill me, but can you blame her? I KILLED the Professor. What's the phrase? An Eye for an Eye.

Needless to say, I'm pretty miserable.

Logan shifts slightly so that his hand is right above my navel. His fingers flex slightly against my stomach, and I feel his warm breath on my neck.

I look around the bedroom of the run-down apartment that Logan and I share. The curtains over the window dance in front or the AC as rain starts to beat off the window. The stained carpet is cluttered with shoes, dirty clothes, and the occasional condom wrapper. Boxes peek out of the only closet in the apartment, which is overflowing with boxes of stuff, mostly winter stuff, clothes, extra blankets, a small pencil tree that I convinced Logan to buy last year.

Once again, Loagn moves, this time he slips his arm across my breasts, then moves his warm lips against my bare neck. "Still can't sleep?" he whispers.

"I hardly can anymore," I reply.

"Want to get your mind off of it?" he asks, propping himself up on his elbow.

"What do you have in mind?"

"Well, Riley's would still be open."

He's implying to a bar off in the outskirts of Manhattan.

I glance at the clock that I had been absent-mindedly staring at for the past two hours and never once comprehended the time. It's now twelve thirty.

"Maybe," I say, "but Telepathy and-"

"Yeah, I know. Telepathy and beer don't mix. But I have Frost on speed dial. And a little ain't gonna hurt ya."

I consider this some. The last thing I want to do is hurt anyone else. Then again, Logan is right, a little drink isn't going to hurt.

"Be in the car in ten minutes," I swing my legs out of bed and quickly change from my shorts and T-shirt to sweatpants and a pink camisole under a white shirt.

We don't make it to the bar.

I wander into the kitchen to grab my car keys when I hear a knock on the front door.

"who the hell would be comin' around at this time?" Logan says from the doorway. I slip past him and through the livingroom.

The door doesn't have any windows, so I have to take a chance and hope it's not a serial killer.

Logan unsheathes his claws as I open the door. There are two people standing on the mat, the first one is Ororo. The second one, with his brown hair, taunt mouth, and leather jacket over red T-shirt, is Scott Summers.

 _This is my first fanfiction in awhile (I use to write some in middle school, but I was never allowed to publish it) so I hope you like it. Let me know if I should continue It._


	2. Chapter 2

**well, I am finally going to be able to post more. I finished two classes and will take the last exams for three more this week, so Then I will be done with collage for the summer. Anyway, hope you like my next chapter. Comment are welcome!**

"Scott… What? How?" I stammer as I watch my supposedly dead fiance stand on the patio, while Logan lingers behind me.

"Ororo said I'd find you here," he says.

"But… how?"

He looks at me, his ruby quartz glasses casting a shadow on his frown, "I don't know," he says, "I just am."

"It's been a year!"

"Tell me about it," he says, "and obviously you took my death pretty well for claiming you loved me-"

Logan steps up behind me, "like she said, It's been a year. where have you been?"

"Canada," Scott says, "I suffered brain damage due to an attempted murder," (he looks towards me as he says this) "I lost a lot of memories. Then all of the sudden they all flooded back to me last week. I was released from the hospital and I came here."

"What about your powers?" I ask, "how did you control them?" I remember all too well, watching his glasses shatter from Logan's hand without being able to stop it.

"Dr. Mctaggert brought me some," he leans against the door frame, "no thanks to you." He adds bitterly.

Logan pushes past me and places his claws onto Scott's throat, "listen bub," blood bubbles around metal, "your suposive death wasn't Jean's fault. if anything it was Xavier's. He placed those damn barriers in her mind and when they broke, she lost control."

"And what did she do? she murdered everyone. I saw the graves back at the school." he looks at me, "I saw mine."

I pull Logan's arm away, drops of blood run down onto Scott's collar, "I couldn't control it, Cyclops!" I snap.

Scott reaches for my wrist, his grip is tight, tighter then he meant I think, "don't you dare use that name as an insult."

Logan grabs onto Scott's shirt and yanks him up with it, "okay, Cyclops, here's the deal, Jean chose me, and there's nothing you can say that will change that!"

Anger boils up in me and I lunge at them, pushing them apart as I do so. Scott stumbles backwards, but regains his footing.

"stop it, both of you!" I yell, "as of right now, I am neither of yours!" and with this, I storm for the apartment, and past Ororo, who steps back to allow me to pass.

I shove the key into the ignition and drive off, leaving them on the patio.

 **five minutes later**

As much as I wanted to get drunk at the moment, I knew I needed a clear brain to think. I pull into the parking lot of a 24 hour coffee shop in downtown North Salem. I go up to the counter and order a double chocolate mocha with extra cream from the bloodshot- eyed man and sit down at one of the booths.

There was only one other person in the shop, a man with short blond hair and brown eyes, which keep darting around at the empty tables. He wears a mauve business suit and shiny, black shoes. We make eye contact, and with one scan of mind, I can tell he's checking me out.

I take a sip of my coffee as the man comes over. "Hello, Jean," He says.

"How do you know my name?" I ask.

He sits down across from me, "I know much about you." he says, "I know that your name is Jean Elaine Grey, you're an extremely powerful mutant, but lived with most of your power suppressed for twenty years. You were engaged to a man, who you then thought you killed, but you were attracted to another way before your lover died. Up until just recently, you lived in the apartment with the other than the original lover came back and you left and came here."

"Either you're a mutant or a stocker," I say.

"Lucas," he offers his hand, "and yes, I'm a psychic."

Just what I need, another mutant attracted to me.

Lucas rips a pink packet of sugar and pours it into his coffee, as he stirs it in, he says, "they never put enough sugar in. I like things sweet." he looks up at me with an expression of flirtation.

"If you know anything about me, then you know I'm not interested," I say.

He cocks his head to one side, "are you sure? Because I'm very interested in you."

"I'm sure," I stand up from the booth and make my way towards the door.

"Wait!" Lucas yells. He rushes up to me and hands my a slip of paper, "this is my number, if you ever want to talk," he then adds in a whisper, "don't you want someone who knows what you want?" he taps his temple with two fingers. Then, with the same flirtatious smile, he goes back to the table.

I leave the coffee shop and pocket the paper. Maybe I am interested in him. I sit down in front of the steering wheel and take out my cell phone. I dial the number and he answers after the second ring.

"we have a date, tomorrow night at eight. I'll meet you here." I say.


	3. Chapter 3

**warning, this chapter is sorta sexy. Nothing graphic, still PG-13. But if you feel uncomfortable reading it, you can just skip it.**

I stay out that night.

About four thirty I go into Walmart to buy an outfit for my date. It wasn't that I didn't have any clothes at the apartment, but I was not going back there. So, here I am in the clothes isle, scanning the shelves and racks.

I finally settle on a red camisole with a foe leather jacket and a black skirt. I pair it with some knee high boots and a silver-painted necklace.

After my early morning shopping spree, I camp out in my car for a while, beating at least thirty levels of Candy Crush on my phone and eating a crumbly granola bar from my purse. I take a walk around a park, then buy some lunch from a stand.

At twenty till eight, I go into the bathroom of the bus station and change my clothes, storing my old outfit in my purse. I dab some concealer under my eyes to hide the bags from a non-restful sleep and paint my lips with a shimmery lip gloss, also from my purse.

When I arrive at the coffee shop, Lucas is waiting on the sidewalk. He wears a dark blue button-down with a pair of jeans and sneakers, it's definitely a change from what he was wearing last night. When he sees (or senses) me coming, he waves. I get out of the car and he meets me in the parking lot.

"Good afternoon, Jean." he says, grasping my hand and bringing it up to his lips.

"Hello."

He takes me to his house and makes me dinner (Chicken Alfredo with a side salad and strawberry cheesecake for dessert). He turns out to be a very good cook. Over dinner we discuss many things. His full name is Lucas Smith, he's thirty one, with a master's degree in the arts and owns a cat named Michelangelo. His mom died when he was sixteen and his dad is out of the picture, so he lived with his grandmother until he moved here.

"Logan won't care if your here. You know that, don't you?" he says across the table.

"Hmm?" I ask, pushing my fork into the cheesecake.

"I can sense you're thinking about him." Lucas put his hand on mine and my stomach starts to flutter.

"I wasn't," I lie. I sort of felt like I was cheating on him, even if I had broken up with him the night before. I realized that I didn't care, and that I actually really like Lucas.

"whatever you say." He stands up and takes the dirty plates to the kitchen.

"we can watch a movie or something now if you want, or we can just talk."

We end up on his couch. I take a sip of wine and set the glass down on the coffee table. I had a glass before this one, and my mind was already starting to fog up.

"So, Jean. Are you drunk yet?" he asks.

"Maybe." my lips curl into a grin and he puts his thumb under my chin.

Then we're kissing. The next thing I know he's leading me to his bedroom and I'm removing his belt with telekinesis. He laughs as he pull my jacket off, it drops to the floor. His lips touch my neck as I unbutton his shirt. and then my camisole comes off.

I fall backwards onto his bed and he follows. our kissing is slopping, and I feel his warm hands on my waist as he slips off my skirt.

I wrap my legs around him and he circles his fingertips over my chest. A gasp of pleasure escapes me and my hands fumble to unfasten his pants.

Soon we're completely tangled up in the sheets. His opened-mouth brushes my collarbone, then my neck, my jaw and finally my mouth, where it stays for awhile. As he pulls away, I bite his lower lip gently.

He asks if I'll stay the night, and I say yes.

His hands cross over my breasts like a protective prison and I fall asleep. Dreamless and sweet.

 **thanks for reading. Xoxo**


	4. Chapter 4

**this chapter also contains some sexual activity. Mostly smut. Nothing rated R.**

I wake up, cold and naked.

I open my eyes and am confused about my surroundings; A damp, dark room. The air smells musty, and the floor feels like packed dirt.

My head throbs from last night's alcohol, making it hard for me to think. Then I realized what happened and nausea washes over me.

Lucas tricked me. Lucas, who was hitting on me from the very moment I sat down in the coffee shop, didn't actually care about me. And I was an idiot to fall for his game.

I stand up and try to find a way out. Some how, my telepathy was being blocked and I couldn't sense anyone outside of my prison, or inside.

Then, above me, a door opens and light flood over a staircase. Lucas' silhouette blocks most of the orange glow. I act fast.

:: Scott, help:: I practically yell telepathically.

:: Jean? wha...:: I lose connection with him when the door closes

Lucas steps down from the bottom step and grabs me behind the head, forcing his lips towards mine.

"What the hell?!" I push his hand away from me and he laughs, "playing hard to get, are we?" he asks.

"Why did abduct me?" I ask.

"It isn't abduction when you come willingly, Jean. Or should I say, Phoenix," he runs his fingers along my jawline and under my chin. Anger and power boil inside of me, two forces that he should never reckon with.

"I'm not just a psychic. I have the power to control people by touch. by affection. And don't worry, you're not the only woman I've done this too, no." He takes a piece of hair behind my ear and I feel myself slipping back into his control.

"You're sick!" I exclaim, pushing against his control.

"I do it for money, " he says.

"Well, I'm not going to pay you to capture me and take advantage of me!"

"no, you got me all wrong. I'm not a prostitute, I took you because someone was looking for you. They paid me and I simply did what I do best. Seduce you. I guess you could call me a sexual bounty hunter."

"Who the hell would be looking for me, who would pay you to find me?" I ask, absolutely livid.

"I don't give away information, Jean," His hand wanders to the small of my back and I forget why I'm mad. I look up at his beautiful eyes and start to unbutton his shirt. soon He's lifting me up towards him pushing me up against the damp wall. my bare legs wrap around his bare hips and his lips are warm against mine.

Then, "enough!" I push him away with Telekinesis and gain my footing. "your powers won't work on me," I say. I grab his shirt from off the floor and put in on.

"I think it just did," he says, and he walks back uo the stairs, "I'll be back down for our two o'clock meeting," he says.

the door opens and I call Scott Telepathically again,

::I've been abducted by some guy::

Without hesitation he replies, ::we're coming::

It's that moment then that I know he still cares for me.

 **thanks for reading. Don't forget to comment. It always makes my day.**


	5. Chapter 5

**thanks for reading my fifth chapter! I have the main idea of how I want to end it, so sit back, relax, and get ready to read some exciting chapters.**

I sit up straight in bed. Sweat beads my forehead and Lucas' arm wraps around my stomach as he sits up beside me.

"It was just a dream," he says gently, "whatever it was, was just a dream. He tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear and kisses my bare neck. "Everything is fine now."

"Knock it off!" I say breathlessly. The bedroom fades away into the cold basement with Lucas is kneeling next to me, his hands on my temples.

"Psychic protections aren't going to work on me either!" I say, Pulling away from his reach.

Lucas smirks as he stands up, "tricky one, eh, Jean." He begins to pace in a circle, from where I sit, to the base of the stairs, and back again. "My employer would be very pleased."

"Who is your employer?" I ask.

"You'll know him when you see him," Lucas stops in front of me again, this time reaching towards the buttons of his shirt that I'm wearing. "Don't even think about it," I push him back with telekinesis, but once again, I could only push him back a few inches before I couldn't anymore. The room seemed to somehow make my powers weaker, like kryptonite.

He stands back up and starts up the stairs again. When he opens the door, a silhouette of a man is already there.

"Ah, My employer," Lucas says.

"Don't call me that, Smith!" the voice was too familiar, like one of those voices that haunt your dreams at night after watching a horror movie.

William Stryker steps out of the shadows. His thinning hair stands at odd angles from him running his fingers through it, and his glasses reflect the sparse light coming in from the crack under the door.

"Why do you want me?" I ask.

"Well, it's simple really, Dr. Grey, I want the Wolverine, and it seems the only way to get him, is to take you." He grabs me by the shoulder and yanks me up.

"he won't fall for it," I hiss.

"Won't he? Because I think he already has." he turns my head towards the stair case. standing on at the top is Logan. Don't throw up. Don't throw up. I tell myself.

Stryker pushes me up the stairs, I stumble on almost every other one. "Logan, don't do this!" I beg, trying to reach out for his hand.

"Go, Jean. Scott is waiting for you outside. I'll be fine." he gives a nod and Lucas grabs my arm and Stryker takes Logan.

Lucas forces me through his house. I pull the shirt over my bottom when we get to the front door.

He opens it and the bright sunlight blinds me. Sure enough, Scott is waiting by his car. Lucas throws me towards him and he grabs my forearms to balance me.

I grab onto Scott and I feel him embrace me, pulling the shirt down as he does so.

"Please tell me you took the pill before you came," he whispers in my ear.

It was odd for him to ask me that. Even when we were dating, he wasn't too obsessed with protection, used more than with Logan... but... I nod nevertheless and he opens the car door for me.

I watch the tree-shaped air freshener dance as Scott drives away from the house and onto the road that the School was on. Tears burn behind my eyeballs, trying to push their way out. My throat ached and all I felt like was crying.

Scott reaches over to me and grabs my hand, "Storm is already traveling down Strykers base," he says, "We'll find Wolverine." he pulls through the gates of the mansion and reaches back to the back seat. He hands me a backpack full of my clothes, "are you ready to go back to school?" He asks.

LOGAN'S POV

Stryker forces him into the back of a black van parked in Lucas' backyard. He had no idea what this son of a bitch needed him for, and he didn't care. The only thing he cared about was Jean's protection. And as much as he hated to hitr it, he knew she'd be much safer with Four-Eyes back at the mansion then she'd ever be with him.

The Van's Engines starts and Logan hits his head off the ceiling as it starts to move. He sits in the corner, bracing himself for what was sure to be a bumpy ride.

 **Thanks for reading! Xoxo! comments and let me know what you think so far!**


	6. Chapter 6

**excited for you all to read this! So without further ado, here's chapter 6.**

We go in through the side door that leads into the kitchen. Scott keeps his hand on the small of my back and I allow it.

My eyes dart around the stainless steel kitchen, it was so familiar to me. Fifteen years of breakfasts, from fighting over pop tart flavors with Peter and Raven to helping kids open ketchup packets or making sure the new, shy ones got enough food.

"Jean?" Scott asks. I hadn't realized I'd stop. My hand held onto the back of one of the chairs. I was being overwhelmed.

"I'm fine," I shake off the feeling of depression and enter the small bathroom outside the kitchen.

I change into a tank top and a pair of yoga pants and turn the water on in the sink. I wash my hands then I scrub up my arms, trying to get Lucas's filth off. I dry off with a wad of paper towels. when I unlock the door and slip out, Scott is waiting outside in the hall.

he grabs my hand and interlaces his fingers with mine. then we go through the maze of hallways and stairs to the dormitories.

"after the... uh... incident, they didn't do anything with our room. Apparently making a kid sleep in a bedroom the belonged to teachers that where considered dead was frowned upon." Scott opens the door and we go into the bedroom that we shared for three years. the room where I lost my virginity, the room where I woke up every day before this hell happened.

"of course I could go to one of the guest bedrooms." he adds.

I remember his reaction when I had said I'd been taken. The way his psychic voice laced with concern. Logan never talked to me like that.

Then like a magnet, I'm drawn to him. I wrap my arms around him and lay my head against his chest.

"I'm sorry," I say. I didn't know what I was apologizing for. For going to Logan? for not grieving him like I was suppose to? for the fight before I left the apartment? it just felt like right thing to say.

his fingers curl the ends of my hair and I feel his lips on the top of my head. tears burn behind my eyes and My breathing is rattledly like it is before I cry. but I don't want to cry. I've cried to much in the past year.

"the Professor is proud of you. you were always his favorite," Scott says.

"proud of what?" I snap, "I'm the one who killed him!" then like a dam being broken, I burst into tears.

I was expecting him to pull away, to look shocked and disown me like Ororo did, but pulls me closer to him and whispers in my ear, "come with me," he grabs my hand and leads me from the bedroom.

I didn't know where we were going until he unlocks the door that leads to the plane foyer.

"where are we-?"

"Muir Island."

"why?"

"you'll see." the blackbird's ramp falls and we enter. "I'm sure Ororo wouldn't mind us going on a joy ride, after all, I am the one who taught her how to fly." he sits in the pilot seat the the plane raises out of the basketball court.

I sit beside him. "what about Logan?" I ask.

"He can wait. Your emotional stability can't." He clicks on a few switches and we start soaring above Westchester County. the last time I did this, the plane was shot down by a misle.

"you don't care about Logan, do you?" I ask.

Scott hesitates, his grip on the controls gets tighter and his mouth forms a straight line across his face. "I know that you care about him, that you've always had. The look you gave when you found out he left. Your excitement when he came back. The way you looked at him on the Blackbird before..." he trails off, "I saw it. So I knew you liked him, and being the Alpha Wolf that I am, I didn't like him, I just never got to know him."

"He's... not like you." I decide.

"He told me what happened when I wasn't there. The kiss outside the Blackbird, the makeout session in the Infirmary. I know about it all."

Make out session? I remember the kiss outside the Blackbird. But I don't remember a make out session.

"I'm sorry." I say again.

"Don't apologize to me, Jean. If I recall we're not dating at the moment."

"okay. so why are we going to Muir Island?" I ask.

He types a comand into the small keypad and says, "because we're going to go see the Professor."

.

 **xoxo thanks for reading! Please comment and let me know what you think 3**


	7. Chapter 7

**thanks for reading! I hope you enjoy :)**

This had to be some kind of sick joke. I killed him. I felt him die. I watched him being pulled apart piece by piece until there was nothing left but an empty wheelchair and twenty years worth of memories.

"Scott, you can't be serious!" all of the sudden I feel nauseated. My vision wobbles for a moment, then I'm okay.

"Professor Xavier is the most powerful telepath in the world, you really thought you killed him?" Scott asks.

"Yes, I did," I say, crossing my arms across my chest. he reaches over and puts a hand on my forearm, keeping his other on the controls. he was a skilled pilot to be able to do that, I knew I ever tried that, the plane would plummet to the ground faster then I would be able to fix it. But he keeps the joysticks steady and I appreciate the caress, even if I don't believe what he just said.

"Jean, you know I'm telling the truth. I can tell."

"Do I?" I ask, "Damn it, Scott, I've literally been here, considering you and him dead and I knew nothing different for a year. You've been here for what, 62 hours? And you know everything."

He takes his hand away, "Ororo was pissed with you, what would you expect her to do? tell you that she falsely accused you and that Professor X is actually alive and well and living ar Muir Island?"

"Yes," I snap. anger and frustration boils in my stomach. I clench my hands and teeth, "that would be the logical thing to do!"

"you were the logical thinker of the team, not her."

I don't say anything else for the rest of the trip. To be honest, I didn't even want to be on this trip. I wanted to be back at the mansion, planning how to break Logan out. I wanted to be out of this situation entirely.

Land comes into view and Scott pushes some switches. According to the GPS, we were right above the Muir Island Research Center. The plane lands on the small runway and Scott stands up.

The Research Center is run by Moira McTaggert, a formal CIA agent who dedicated her life to Mutant Study.

She's a short woman, with graying hair and blue eyes hid under thick glasses. It's hard to comprehend that she is the same age as the Professor.

"Good afternoon, Scott, Jean." She says as we walk into the lobby, a small room with a high ceiling, chairs surrounding a television and a front desk, sort of like a hospital waiting room. "I'll tell Charles that you're here. Of course, he probably already knows."

"So he's really alive, huh?" I ask. Scott nods and takes my hand in his.

When Moira comes back, the three of us go up in the elevator to the dormitories. She opens the door to the room, 38, and classical music flows out.

There, sitting at a desk, reading a thick-cover book, Is Charles Xavier. Yet another man I thought I killed.

 **AN: What y'all think? I couldn't stand leaving such an important character dead, so I enough him back. Comments are always welcome. Feedback, critism, praise, all of that is taken to heart. XOXO**


	8. Chapter 8

**I'd like to apologise a head of time for this chapter being so short. I really felt it was important for this chapter to sort of stand alone. Also, I've hit a writer's block, so if any of you would like to suggest scenes, that would be greatly appreciated.**

Tears tingle my eyes, threatening to fall. I blink a few times and the feeling disappears.

The Professor lays his book down on the desk and folds his hands in his lap. "Good afternoon, Jean, Scott." wrinkles in the corners of his eyes form as he smiles at us.

Moira says something, but it is inaudible to me. My vision fall somewhere past the Professor, I couldn't make eye contact with him. Once again, tears threaten to come. This wasn't possible. He should be dead. I killed him.

Scott squeezes my hand, "Jean?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

The Professor chuckles, "you are probably wondering how I'm here, Jean."

I nod.

"Well, when Phoenix attempted to kill me, I made a connection with my twin brother..."

"He'd been here for decades," Moira adds, "he was born without direct conscious."

"Yes, thank you Moira." the Professor nods then continues, "I made a connection with him, converting my mind into his, so that even though my physical body was destroyed, my psychic body still lived."

I gave up at not exchanging eye contact and stare blankly at him. "Why didn't you tell us that you could do that?" I ask.

"Because I did not know if it would work. I did not want to get anyone's hopes up if it would not work." he smiles.

"Why not come back to the school?" I ask.

"Ororo is doing an excellent job at keeping it. I thought I'd take a vacation."

Retiring sounds more like it.

Scott's phone rings and he answers it. After a few moments, he covers the speaker and says, "they found Logan. He's in pretty bad shape. We need to get back."

"Logan has a healing factor," I say.

"Well, it's not kicking in. Let's go!"

 **Xoxo**


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry for such the delay. I got an Internship at the local hospital and it had kept me on busy. So I've made this chapter extra long and full if fluff... enjoy!**

"His healing factor should be kicking in!" I say. Logan lays, unresponsive, on the exam table of the infirmary. cuts and scraps crisscross his face, chest, and arms. Plus the skin around his righr eye is a deep shade of violet and he has two broken ribs. I have never seen him like this before, almost beyond recognition, not even when he allowed Rogue to have his powers.

Ororo stands opposite of me, watching the heart monitor, the IV drip, Logan, anything to not make eye contact with me.

"can't you take blood or something?" She asks, nervously.

"I can try, but if his blood pressure is as low as the machine is saying." it was difficult on the other side to find a vain for IVs, but grab a needle from the drawer nevertheless and wipe the crease of his elbow with a alcohol swap.

I have a hard time finding a vain again. finally I get a steady flow of blood into the bottle. then I put it through the spinner.

"Will he be okay?" Ororo asks, looking over my shoulder at the screen showing his results.

"He seems perfectly healthy, just slightly dehydrated, which is odd, but nothing else is out of the ordinary. Why are you so concerned?" then I get a glimse of her mind.

"how long have you liked him?" I ask with a smile.

"what? I do not like him!" Ororo smiles and patches of pink raise in her cheeks.

"I'm psychic, I know these things. so how long has it been?"

"it doesn't matter. his heart belongs to you. I'm out of luck."

"not true. He's lived for hundreds of years. I think he's had like fifty girlfriends." I say with a short laugh.

Ororo raises her brow. "Well, you his most recent."

"People can change," I say. "I have Scott."

"what?" she asks, "he told me that he was leaving."

"like leaving leaving?" I gasp.

"yeah, Like leaving leaving. he said he got a job offer from Moira."

I storm past her and out the infirmary door. "Watch Logan!" I yell.

"wait! what do I do if he wakes up?" she calls back.

"I don't know, have you ever heard the British term snogging?"

With that I turn down the hall and march up to our bedroom, where Scott is folding his clothes and laying them in his suitcase.

"what the hell is this about you leaving?" I snap.

"Does it matter?" he asks, keeping his back towards me, "all you've done since I got back was yell at me."

"that is not true!" I say, feeling as exasperated as I sounded, "Scott, I love you."

I walk over towards him and grab onto his shoulder. he turns around to face me. "I'm sorry if I've been cranky, but if you haven't noticed, I've been though a lot these past couple of days." then I'm pushing my lips against his. his hands trail down to my leg and grabs me under the knee. soon we are falling onto the bed. I feel his hands on the bottom of my shirt hem and jerk up.

"Jean, I'm sorry," Scott says, sheepishly.

"No, it's okay," I curl my knees into my chest, "it's just, Lucas did the same thing. I'm just not ready for it yet."

"I'm so sorry that happened to you," he says, wrapping his arm around my shoulder, I fall onto his chest.

"I just wish I has realised what kind of person he was when I first met him at the coffee shop. I was so frustrated with you and Logan that I wasn't even thinking straight. I just wish I would have thought to read his mind thoroughly." I was rambling now, but Scott was listening intently, nodding slowly in agreement.

After a while I stand up, "did you really get a job at Muir Island?" I ask.

"No. I just needed an excuse to get out. However..." he reaches for my hand, "I may have a reason to stay."

LOGAN'S POV

Stryker may have tortured him, but nothing was more torture than staring at Ororo's body and knowing that she was probably off limits. She was wearing an extra tight shirt with a pair of skinny jeans, which showed off all her curves.

"Logan," she says.

"Hmm?" he asks.

"How do you feel? Do you need anything?" she walks over to the side of the table and takes his hand.

"I need you..." damn, why did he just say that?

"Logan... I..." She bends down and kisses his rough cheek. "What about Jean?"

"She has Cupcake," Logan didn't know for sure if she was chosen Scott over him, but he had the feeling.

"Well then," He could tell that Ororo was out of her comfort-zone, and for all he knew, she could be gay. But he wanted her. He craved her.

Then she's placing her lips onto his. He swiftly lifts her up onto him and claws at her body. The air gets cold around them and stuff begins to blow around. With a quick peak, Logan could tell that her eyes were glowing white. She was losing control, but he didn't care. Neither did she by the looks of it.

"How the tides change," Jean's voice comes from the doorway and Logan pulls away, cursing himself for not smelling or hearing her.

Ororo hurries off of the exam table, smoothing her clothes frantically as she does so.

Scott follows Jean in. "What did I miss?" He asks.

Jean smiles, "I'm glad to see you took our breakup well, Logan, because I know how awkward it can be to work with your ex."


	10. Chapter 10

**Au: once again, I apologize for such a delay. I've been very busy lately, and it's very hard for me to find time to write. But this little piece was thought up at 1:30 this morning due to the fact that I made the mistake for drinking a red bull at four in the afternoon (I'm very caffeine sensitive) so, I really hope you enjoy this :) hopefully I'll get another chapter up this week. But no promises. Thank you all for being so patent! Now, without further ado, chapter 10 (woohoo! We've hit double didgets) enjoy!**

"Talk about a love triangle," Ororo says.

I smile as I look down at my mug of hot cocoa, the melted whipped cream swirling like a cloud on the top.

A few days after I get back, Ororo and I sit in the kitchen, waiting for curfew to hit and for the students to all scurry to bed. Logan went out for a drink, and Scott decided to join him, leaving us two women to hold down the fort. Not that it's a huge deal. Unless someone burns the school down or gets seriously injured, there's not much to do but sit and wait for bedtime.

"It's quiet," I state, noticing the absents of shouts and laughter.

"A lot of students were pulled out after the cure came out," Ororo says simply, but she sets her tea down with a force that causes the amber liquid to splash the oak surface of the table.

"Oh?" I had heard a lot about the cure, but both Logan and I decided against it almost instantly. We agreed that there was just something untrustworthy about it. It had already caused many uprisings around the clinics that offered it.

"Even some of the young adults were taken by their parents and forced to get it," she says bitterly, "some considered it a gift though and couldn't wait to get it. Rogue, for example, was one."

"You mean the girl who came with Logan?" I ask.

"Yes. She was dating Bobby Drake. But she found it difficult not to be able to touch him. So she went and had her powers 'cured'." she uses air quotes for the word cured. "For him, of course. A few weeks later I found him in Kitty Pryde's bed though. I don't know what happened, but Rogue and Bobby are no more." she sighs, "neither of them are here anymore."

"You're not a supporter of the cure, then?" I ask. I mean, why should she. In Africa, she is considered a goddess. If things got too rough here, she could just go back.

"No. If you are, I'm not going to judge you though." her answer takes me back for a moment.

"If I was, I'd have it by now. Telepathy can be a real pain in the ass, but There's just something strange about the cure. It, disturbs me. I don't know why." genetics can't be changed. Not without mutations and years of evolution at least. Science cannot speed these things up, at least to my knowledge, so how can some scientists come up with a way to shut off Mutations? It makes no sense.

A silence lingers over the table for a while. Ororo takes slow sips of her tea and I drain my mug when the clock hits ten. Curfew.

"Better make sure everyone's in bed," I stand up, but Ororo doesn't move, "Jean. I think I owe you an apology." she begins. "I really shouldn't have held it over your head what happened to the Professor. I just don't know how to process grief efficiently. So much fell on my shoulders, with him dying, then before that, Scott. So I blamed you. which was stupid since I knew you wouldn't really kill him. You wouldn't kill either of them. And it was the Professor's fault in the first place anyway. But after I found out he wasn't dead, I realized how much of a bitch I had been. But I still couldn't persuade myself to apologize. Then Scott came back and I realized you didn't really kill anyone at all. That night is kind of all a blur right now. But I know you went through hell. And I'm sorry I wasn't there." She had stood up and is now waiting for me to reply.

I was speechless. I could only stare down at the floor as my throat tried to form words. My emotions towards that were still being processed. I could break down into tears, or start yelling at her for being a terrible friend any minute. But for now I'm silent.

"Jean?" she asks.

Then, with a swift few steps I embrace her. Not an awkward side hug, but a full on, bushy-white-hair-all-up-in-my-face hug.

"I guess we should go check on the students now," I say after a while.

"Yeah, maybe." she agrees.

We just get to the door when a earsplitting alarm goes off. "What the..." My question is cut off by the sprinkler system kicking in, and thick black smoke billowing under the door.

to be continued

 **Xoxo :) Love you guys!**


	11. Chapter 11

**An: it feels like forever since I have updated this. I have been struggling with wrters block for over month, but now I have finally worked out how this is going to end. Remember to F &F along with comment. It always makes my day! **

Lucas. That's the first thing that comes to mind as I watch the smoke penetrate the room. I try to scan the grounds for him, but all I get is four dozen students and staff panicking as they run through the smoke to the exits.

Ororo doesn't hesitate to open the door and run out, her eyes fogged over. She'd probably set rain to whatever is in flames. Or blow out the smoke with some Arctic winds. Or fry the person who caught the house on fire. It was hard to tell with her.

**Scott! The school is full of smoke or something. How long till you can get back?**

It takes him a moment to respond, **we're on our way. But call the damn fire department.**

Then out of the corner of my eye I see him. Lucas. Standing at the edge of the forest outside the window. A gasmask hanging from his neck. He winks at me and smirks.

**he's here.**

**who is?** Scott asks.

I can't respond. Instead I quickly open the window, and slip out, choking on the smoke.

"Lucas!" I scream.

"Honey, I'm home." He opens his arms like he wants to embrace me. Rule of thumb is to not let him touch me. If I do he seduces me, and I can't afford a slip up. Lucky for me, I have telekinesis. And well, let's just say without his powers he doesn't seem to have much.

I grip my hands into fists as I stare him down, the building going down in flames behind me. This man has caused me great pain. He had caused Logan to be captured, and me to be raped. Why shouldn't he die? And why shouldn't I have the pleasure of doing it?

I had kept this specific power under a rock, swearing to myself that I would never use it against another human being again. But Lucas wasn't human. I feel the desire to disintegrate him bubble up in me every second. I smile creeps onto my lips as I finally release my powers. Then like slow motion, his outer layer begins to peel away in tiny pieces. Organs and arteries are pulled apart, cell by cell, and float upwards in the wind. His smirk changes to a scream. Then Lucas was gone.

I fall to my knees as I quickly gain control of my powers again. I hear someone calling my name, and I turn around to see the mansion not on fire anymore. Scott is coming around the corner, followed by Logan and Ororo.

"Jean, are you okay?!" Scott rushes over and kneels beside me. He pushes strands of hair from my face and behind my ear. "What happened?"

"Lucas. He was… I killed him. He… he caught the mansion … where's the fire?"

"That's what I was going to ask next." He says , "There was never a fire."

Logan and Ororo are both watching me intently, "you killed that son of a bitch?" Logan asks.

I nod.

"Do you need Frost? I still got her on speed dial?" He takes his phone from his pocket.

"Frost?" Scott asks, like he's heard the name before and is trying to place it.

"Does anyone want to explain what is happening?" Ororo asks.

I come to a conclusion, "Lucas is a telepath. He doesn't need touch to project psychic images."

"But why did he do it?" Scott asks, "the last time it was because Stryker wanted Wolverine."

"Don't remind me," Logan grumbles.

Scott continues, "so why did he come here?"

"I have a feel it wasn't because he wanted to apologize," I say.

Logan stops, "Shh." He takes a deep breath through his nose, "He's here."

"Who?" Scott asks.

"Stryker." I mumble.

Just as the last syllable leaves my lips, bright search lights scan the grounds from the sky, and the loud roar of helicopters fill the once quiet air.

"Dammit!" Scott says.

the grass around us blows as the helicopters get lower. Soon agents are jumping out and pointing guns at us. Then Stryker pushes through and says, "we won't attack unless you refuse to give us the Wolverine."

Logan looks back at me, then at Ororo. At first I thought his expression was questioning, then I realized it was apologetic. Then he steps forward and puts his wrists out, "take me away, Willy."

Ororo grabs his shoulder, "don't," she snaps.

'Ro, I got to. The students can't get hurt."

Ororo stands on her tiptoes and kisses him.

"How touching," Stryker rolls his eyes, he then snaps a pair of handcuffs onto Logan. Then he nods to his agents. Who grab Logan by the arms and push him into the nearest helicopter.

As the copter's raise, Ororo's eyes cloud over and lighting cracks through the sky, nearly hitting one of the vessels. Scott quickly grabs her, "Ororo, let him go."

"What if it was Jean who they were taking?" She commands, "you wouldn't just 'let her go'!" She crosses her arms tightly across her chest. Her dark cheeks are glowing red.

"That's exactly why we are going to go get him." Professor Xavier rolls out from the corner of the building. "But first we need to figure out why Striker has taken him twice in a matter of days."


	12. Chapter 12

****warning** this chapter contains a little bit of sex. Tread with caution.**

"The question is, how do we get in, and more importantly, how do we get Logan out?" Professor Xavier asks the group of three. We all sit around the table in the War Room, a blueprint of Styker's labs laid our in front of us. The computer screens hooked to the wall have everything from a view of the building which hold's the labs, to Logan's MRIs from almost two years ago.

Ororo is quickly taping the screen of a laptop, trying to bring up any information on Stryker's experiments that she can from the S.H.E.I.L.D. database. The Professor has gone into Cerebro on multiple occasions, but with negative results each time. Scott has prepped the jet for if we have to leave at moment's notice, and I've been in charge of keeping everything organized as we research the mission.

"it's a standard security camera/alarm beam system," Scott says, "basic Danger Room training right there. I blast the cameras and Ororo sets fog so that we can see the ultrared."

"What about guards?" Ororo asks.

"That's why there is a telepath on the team," I say, reading over her shoulder, an article about high radiation in a small village in Canada. They blame a newly found technology, but the coordinates are the same as Striker's base.

"Oh, so you are going to disintegrate them?" She critises.

"Hey, don't even bring that up." I snap.

"You know, if you hadn't gone insane and jumped out that window, we wouldn't be in this situation!"

"How do you assume that?"

"You told Scott that the mansion was on fire, which brought them back here. Don't you realize it was all a trap?" She stands up, meeting my height.

"I was under a psychic impression. Let's see you respond well to someone who raped you standing outside the burning building you're in."

"If you hadn't have stormed off when things got complicated that night, you wouldn't have even met Lucas. And more importantly, Logan would still be here. You are the entire reason why things played out like they did!"

"Oh, well I'm sorry Logan didn't kill me at Alcatraz. Then you two could have lived happily ever after months ago."

"You know he wouldn't have let you go if he killed you."

"He heals fast."

"You selfish little bitch! You know a part of him will always love you. You're just to tangled up in your own drama to realize what you had before... No offence, Scott."

Scott cuts in, "back to the mission…"

"Shut up, Scott." I say, "My own drama? What the hell are talking about?"

"You killed people, Jean! Your thirty years old and can't control your powers! that's ridiculous. Again, no offence, Scott."

"Oh, let's see you control some telepathy!"

"I can control the weather. Telepathy would be easy."

"Okay, and when you have the blood of over forty on your hands, let me know how you like it. Do you think I want any of this? I lived for a year thinking that I killed two of the most important men to me. Hating that Logan even let me live."

"That's something we can agree on," her dark completion is flushed, and I can only assume my cheeks match my hair.

"What's that?" I demand.

"Hating that Logan let you live. He should have killed you right then and there."

"Well, have fun finding him without me." I whip around and storm from the war room. My footsteps echo through the metal-sheeted hall as I march to the elevator, which takes my to the bedroom. The bed sheets are ruffled from neither Scott or I making it that morning. In anger I yank a pillow off and throw it at the wall. It hits with a thud and slides to the floor.

Furious with the tears that begin to stream down my face, I throw novels and journals from my bedside table. Magneto. The Brotherhood. Lucas. Now Ororo. These people stepped over the line and completely abuse it. I wouldn't put up with these idiots anymore. I was slowly deteriorating from the inside because of these people, and I wouldn't allow it anymore.

Strong arms wrap around me and pull "Les Miserables" from my hand. "This could hurt if it hit someone," Scott says, calmly, setting it on the bed.

"I can think of a few people I'd like to at the moment." I say.

He turns me around so I face him, his glasses casting shadows on the rest of his face like they did that night when this whole massacre started. "I don't think you mean that."

"That whore should have shut her mouth way before she did."

"Jean, calm down."

"She can't even begin to understand what it takes to be a psychic. She can control clouds, but oh look! She was treated as a damn goddess for years! What does she know?!"

"There are students asleep," he reminds me. Which is just a nice way of telling me to shut up.

I was ready to tell someone off. But when he touches the nape of my neck with his fingertips, it sparks something.

"I'm so sorry," I say, getting a grip on myself.

"For what?"

"Everything!" I exclaim. I realize a fundamental truth. I didn't deserve him by any means. Despite his occasional temper and inpatients with the team, Scott has been patient with me. He's given me more patients then what I deserve. He's calm when I fly off the handle, and most importantly his strength seems to pour into me anytime we get close, giving me the energy to go on without being suicidal like I was before.

And right now I really needed his strength.

I stand up on my tiptoes and lay my lips gently on his. When he kisses back, that one action causes me to completely lose it.

"Would it be a bad time to do it?" I ask.

He laughs but I'm not sure if it was because he thought it was a good idea or because I asked like some awkward twelve-year-old.

He lifts me up with my back against the wall and slowly kisses up and down my neck, I wrap my legs around his waist and tangle his hair around my fingers. I meet his lips, and I find the buttons to his shirt. His hands find the hem to my own and I raise my arms to allow him to take it off. It falls to the floor.

He swiftly pulls me to the bed, I take my hair from the elastic and it cascades over my shoulders. He combs through the curls to my scalp to get deeper in my lips. A small gasp escapes me, but he doesn't seem to notice. At some point we get tangled in the bedspread, and I knew the bed was a mess of blankets that got shoveled around during the intercourse. It doesn't stop us, though.

Most importantly it felt GOOD. I didn't feel wrong or dirty afterwards. I didn't fear facing the next day, I didn't worry what Ororo would say if she knew what we were doing up here, because I was with Scott. And Scott was all I needed right now. Scott was what I needed all along. All these months that I had been struggling to recover, I finally find peace in bed with him. My first love. I wasn't going to lose him again. Ever.

to be continued

 **AN: when in doubt, add a sex scene. I really wanted to get a chapter posted this week, so here we are. The next one will have more action, but I really wanted to have at least one chapter where Jott gets a little dirty (okay, it wasn't too bad, but it was fun to write). I feel like sometimes Jean and Scott are like the "model couple" who ever parent wants their child to follow, so I really wanted a chapter like this. Also, I'm sorry to those who love Ororo, because where I ship her with Logan, I'm not a super big fan. So if I make her sound bad, that's why. I hope y'all like it. Remember to Favorite, Follow, and Review!**

 **Also, A HUGE thank you to all who have read this, because this story has had over 2,000 views! I don't know iyfif that's a thing y'all celebrate on here, but I'm ecstatic.**


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